Snitches get much worse than Stitches at BMsF, they get DiZZISSED

There is no need for any negativity on BMsF. It is a blog without hate, except it has a significant amount of hate. But I don't need new members who find this blog because they're are stealing music tastes of others. These people can leave and never return. They can doubt all they want, but guess what BMsF was built around doubt and just because your life does not stack up to the people around you, doesn't mean you have to come to cyber space, something you've built your life around, and drop negative remarks that really have no truth behind them. Although, the assuming remark was dead on (I shouldn't assume), but beyond that you got shit.

One of my pet peeves is that people think they know someone else because they hang out 5 times a year...come on. You're just making assumptions based on the very little knowledge you have or hear about that person and I think YOU, of all people, know what assuming does.

So believe what you will, believe what you want, in the end you got nothin', never have never will. No skills, no trades, no ladies, and I don't think you have a blog? If so, does it have over .34 readers a month? I highly doubt that.

Here's a little picture for everyone...blast from the past...maybe the snitch should have started using rogaine because damn the past 5 years have been rough. I guess you don't really need conditioner anymore.


P.S. I'm not calling Tunde Adebimpe a snitch, I have no information that he is or has ever been a snitch.
P.S.S. BRMC in one week...see you there snitch!

Old Skool (literally) Part Uno

I'm gonna try something new. One day a week I'm going to post a college assignment that I turned in at some point during my college career. I will try to give you a little background, if I remember the grade I received I'll post that, and the date created if found will be posted...hopefully you'll just be able to enjoy CcT from the years past. I will not alter these documents one bit, I will simply copy and paste. Let me inform you that I was not always in my right mind, for various reasons, but that makes this even more enjoyable. Some of these assignments might be multiple parts because of their length. Also, feel free to reproduce or use these anyway you see fit. Say you're in college and need a quick essay on Greenpeace, well I might just have one of those and if it's posted then it's fair game. I only ask for 99% of all money you make off it.

PART UNO
A blast from the past...this was the invention of the Koko name and as you can see from the getgo, I had many great ideas, but ultimately as shown from the below my main objective from the getgo was to piss off koko. This was not turned in as an assigment just something I put together and posted throughout the dorms, and torn down very quickly after by koko himself. It was created Wednesday February 23, 2005 (I just realized that was pretty much 5 years ago to the day...scary).

Condition that Shit

I'm sorry, I know this has been one of my hot button issues lately but I think it's absolutely critical that readers of BMsF know my position on this issue and try to spread the word.

Everyone, especially females, need to use conditioner. In today's world of 'looks reign supreme' one of the easiest ways to look amazing is by having fantastic hair. You can style it however you want, but ultimatley it comes down to the, pay attention to this word, CONDITION of your hair. It doesn't have to be an expensive conditioner just something to follow up a shampoo. It takes 30secs to 1min to properly condition your hair and it does a world of difference.

I don't want frizzy hair all up in my grill, I want to be able to spot a girl worth my while from 100 feet away, there are only two ways to do this: Body type and hair condition. If the fuckin' disco ball ain't reflecting off the hair then I'm not even gonna attempt that. I mean think about this...if she can't even take care of her hair, one of her most essential elements then how the fuck is she going to take care of anything else in her life. Of course, I look into how it's cut, the layering, the coloring, the style and I know that this is not of utmost importance to guys but really just think about it. Frizzy hair = shitty girl (this is not a scientific correlation, but I have enough experience to draw a simple conclusion).

One recommendation, guys just keep a bottle of conditioner in your shower. Even if you don't use it, it will truly benefit you in many ways. 1) A girl that see's this in your shower realizes that you may actually have some good common sense. It may be the factor that pushes her over the edge because you are able to show some sentiment and hell same correlation (shitty hair = shitty guy). 2) Say you are letting a girl shower at your place (I don't care why) and she didn't plan ahead and have her own shit (again no details needed, --side note: if she brings her shit to your place and doesn't bring conditioner, get her ass to the street asap--) she can use your conditioner, this way she doesn't skip a day, because then you couldn't see her until she showered properly. 3) Just fucking use it yourself. Trust me, tangle free, shiny, smooth...the whole package.

I know this seems like a petty thing but I mean showering, washing your hair is something everyone does (every respectable person, that is), it's like the 6th amendment, and you can't do something that takes 30 seconds but yet adds an incalculable amount of value to your life then shit you ain't worth anyone's time, especially mine!

A very good conditioner...one of many million...

IT HURTS...I CRY...I'M DEHYDRATED

Any of you who know me just the slightest amount know the past 8 months of my life has been utterly consumed by one person. This person is like someone I have never met before, this person has every single trait that I'm looking for in a girlfriend...no scratch that...in a wife. Every minute of my life is consumed with thoughts of her, how much I like her, how much my life has improved since I've known her, and most importantly how the fuck can I break her and her boyfriend up and then move in on that.

This person is ASIAN.

It is with great sorrow that I write that she is leaving my place of employment. She has been offered a much better position with a much stronger company. I do not blame her...well yes I do. I am CRUSHED! She made going to work 100x better, she made it fun, she made it seem worthwhile. Now I have to go sit in my fucking cube knowing that 10 feet away there is no more Asian, it is as if a piece of me has died. As I've said this was probably the most normal, sane relationship I had ever been in. We talked everyday and as our time together grew we talked about everything and every day I realized how perfect she is.

Just read the below paragraph and try to tell me that she is not perfect for me....

She is amazingly attractive/gorgeous/beautiful, she drives a Lexus, she is materialistic and fashion oriented, she's skinny, she's smart, she enjoys sports including baseball, she has seen Eyedea & Abilities (I mean some people who 'love' underground hip-hop can't even pronounce their name!) live (years ago...amazing) and knows about underground hip-hop among many other music types, she has a sense of humor including sarcasm, shes a total bitch to other people, she gave me prescription drugs to enjoy, our kids were going to be the ultimate leaders (Aryan Race Samurai Ninjas), but most of all she actually thought I deserved this job and I'm pretty sure she is the first person who has ever believed in me.

I'm sure I'm forgetting some of her key traits but I mean how can she not be my perfect girl. She is! I really have nothing else to say, it has been a very dark day for me indeed but ultimately I feel that we have a connection and somehow someway we will end up with each other, even if it requires a murder and let's just say a GHB, that's very hypothetical.

--Side Note-- Also, she was going to be part of the Chinese Dragons Dos, which if you aren't familiar with the Chinese Dragons Uno let me fill you in. They were the largest Korean gang in Littleton Colorado. Their reign lasted from 2003-2004, with a total of 4 members at their peak. The ruled the 3 school LPS district with an iron fist, they had drag races daily and were also known for such things as ruthlessly spraying soy sauce in enemies eyes. Well let me just say that their leader went into hiding after the heat was put on them but the Chinese Dragons were coming back to full strength in 2010, surpassing their previous high with 5 members. But now that is all up in the air. So don't cry for me but cry for the Chinese Dragons----

I feel I left many things out, I wrote this on the BlackBerry downtown after Happy Hour with Asian among others...we spoke, she asked me about my girl situation, I did not know how to answer that. The day was long, it was hard, it had it's ups and it had one major down. The night is still strong because in case you were wondering how Eyedea & Abilties was brought up with Asian it's because I'm currently at the Marquis watching Eyedea & Abilities with Shannon, I guess my girl situation.

A apologize for the grammar and spelling mistakes and hopefully this formats well enough on the blog...PLEASE provide me with any suggestions on how to move on from this difficult time because I feel like every time I see her in the next 2 weeks I'm gonna Ted Mosby it, by just saying I love you.


P.S. One way I'm gonna try and get over this is when I get home...no scratch that...right now via the iPod Touch, is I'm gonna watch/view a whole HEAP of Asian porn!!!!

Still Alive...Kind Of...Not Really

I'm sitting here listening to BRMC and watching the Jayhawks dismantle the Longhorns - Rock Chalk - I thought it might be a good time to update you cunts...

So many things are constantly going through my head but yet I never have the time, well actually never have the energy to write any of that shit down. I cannot force myself to be funny, it just naturally has to happen and that is why this blog has been dormant for several months now. A once thriving community of stoners/bitches/and cowboys has been left for dead but do not fear because everyday that I sit in my cube and think about how fucking burnt out I am you guys/gals/its are always in the back of my mind.

I would rather give you no blog than a Sub-par blog. It was almost one year ago that I wrote my infamous 'valentines' day post that really put this blog on the charts. But that was then...when I was in class for 2 hours a day, and had pretty much no other goals in life. Today though it's slightly different. I still have no goals but I work 9 hours a day, have a semi-serious relationship with some crazy bitch, am constantly trying to move in on the Asian and just recently ran into one of my past soul mates. Not only am I battling all that pussy, I'm also fighting a very different kind of pussy. I'm always trying to destroy other peoples lives at the same time, I need people who are complete failures around me at all times and this is not always easy. So as you can see my slate is full of really stupid shit but it's full none the less.

As I said though...I have a lot of great stories brewing I just have to set the time to get that shit into the world wide web. I promise you though, I have not lost ONE FUCKING STEP, I'm still the one, the only, the original COOLcalmT. So please continue to check back regularly because BMsF will return to the glory days.


As always..........MUCH LOVE from Casa De Amour......

P.S. I forgot to mention that when I'm not working or battling pussy I'm looking for it on the web...STILL LOVE THE PORN...great shit, takes up 4-5hrs a day, so as you can see I'm bushed (pun somewhat intended??)