Marlow's Cleverness

After the one snitch I figured I would try and update my out of staters on the newest and bestest phrases of Colorado's very own Altitude reporters, Scott Hastings and Chris Marlow.

• JR Smith has never really gotten a nickname this year, last year their was a fierce debate as to whether he should be called the toaster oven, microwave oven, or any other clever name having to do with a warming machine. I like to call JR Smith "Spaz" because that's just him and if you watch him, 80% of the time I'm not sure he knows what hes doing but no matter because hes gonna do it.
  

• Chris Andersen (The Birdman) already had one of the best nicknames in the NBA so Marlow decided he would come up with a good nickname for his hair style. He has various ones but I often hear "Birdzilla" being thrown around a significant amount of the time.
  

• There have been no Lithuanian Liquidators thrown around for Kleiza this year, hes had an off year and Marlow does not support those.

• Chauncey is known as Mr. Big Shot and Marlow likes that.

• Renaldo Balkman is called "Naldo" a very clever shortening of his first name, once again it proves that Marlow is on top of his game.

• There are various other names that he just comes up with on the spot for Nene, Kenyon, and the rest. These names are often a one time deal, but you can guarantee that if the Nuggets are ahead by 20 or more at least 50% of his reporting will be on a new nickname or some hilarious event. The best part of this is Scott Hastings and his response or lack thereof, because I truly find Hastings very funny.

• The best part of this season as with the past seasons are the awards they hand out. There is no more Subway sub of the Game, which was always a favorite. This year they brought back the Lexus Drive of the Game, this is always fiercely debated from the first layup of the game. They added the Mattress King Rejection of the Game, usually 3 or 4 good options to choose from for this. The best this year though, a new edition, is simply TACOS! Anytime the Nuggets score 103 or more you can go into Taco Bell the next day and get 3 free tacos with a purchase of drink. Every game you pray for 103 points and Marlow will not forget about the Tacos. He told many stories of his great adventures into Taco Bell the next day, by far TACOS has become a fan favorite.

Well I believe that is all that this amazing year in Nuggets Basketball has offered. A great year with plenty of tacos offered. Round 2 is about to start, I despise the Mavs I mean look at that team...Dirk, Jason Kid, that little Spaniard Barrera and the rest. Go Nuggets, but most of all score 103!!!

The Gay List Continues

We all know there are plenty of Gay things in this world, like fish sticks, but all that's being added to the gay list today is two people who are incredibly homosexual.

Ryan(koko): So gay. So flaming. Loves the backdoor. Not much else to say except that he is so fuckin' gay it hurts, it hurts more than normal sodomy hurts. He is now hated and gay, but basically those two words go together pretty well so it isn't that shocking. He should forget important things, because now, he has to be considered OFFICIALLY GAY FOREVER.

Greg(gregarious): Total fag. Total queer. Loves the pole. He is even gayer than koko, i know it is hard to believe, but it is so true. Such a flaming cowboy it is not even funny, well slightly funny. That's all...GREG IS GAY, IT IS OFFICIAL!!

*These two people are different from the other items on the gay list because if you talk with or hang out with either Greg or Ryan you do no become gay, unless you do gay things that are on the gay list...like ride around in wheel chairs. So no worries you cannot contract HIV from hanging out with either of them, you still may contract swine flu...so be careful.

SO GAY!

What a Month of Sports

My two favorite teams kept me very happy in the month of April and look to continue this fantastic progress in May.


The Royals finished the month of April with a 12-10 record. This was their first winning record in April since 2003, good enough for first place in the American League Central, and they have a Cy Young Contender in Zack Greinke who ended April with a 5-0 record and .50 ERA. Their bats are starting to wake up and their defense is one of the best in all of the Majors. I see two areas of concern: First, their bullpen is weak, they lost two of their best middle relievers from last year (Ramon Ramirez and Leo Nunez) off-season trades and the relievers they have now are shaky, some more than others. They need to improve this area, since they have the best closer in the league, Joakim Soria, who absolutely destroys batters in the 9th. Secondly, they need to get rid of Sidney Ponson and bring up Luke Hochevar who is throwing amazingly well in Omaha. This would give them 5 starters who are capable of going out on the mound every night and completely dominating late into the game. If they can improve on these two areas they can easily contend in the central this year. They still gave me one hell of a month, with every game being solid...I know, since I watched every one.

The Nuggets play has spoken for itself. They completely dominated the Hornets, and still receive no credit. I have never been more excited for basketball in my entire life, this is amazing. If they play as well as they did in the 1st round throughout the playoffs I don't know if they can be beat, my god, think of the possibilities. First things first, they need to take down Mark Cuban in an absolutely embarrassing fashion, but no matter what they have already exceeded my wildest expectations.

This is from one of the games against the Hornets of what the Nuggets can bring to the table. I also added it for people who may not get to hear the great broadcasting of Scott Hastings and Chris Marlow, in my opinion, the greatest duo ever! HEY HEY NENE!

The Hate List Continues

It has been a while and the Hate list needs to be updated. If you are an avid reader of BMsF then you already know two items/people that will be placed on the Hate list but I'm planning on adding a few more. Trust me I have enough Hate but I often forget what I originally planned to Hate on. I will try to limit the description of why I Hate these items/people, as long as you know what I Hate then we'll be in good shape.

7. People Who Cannot Lie, But Continue Trying to Lie: I consider myself an expert liar, it is currently on my resume as one of my best skills. I'm very proud of this skill because I believe it gives me an edge in whatever situation I'm in. But there are people who cannot lie, which is fine, but these people feel that they should continue lying no matter what. They obviously assume that they are amazing liars, but everyone knows that they are making complete asses of themselves. So either stop lying and just tell the truth or take lessons and become a good liar.

6. Ryan (koko): Well this was pretty easy, he forgot my birthday...so he is HATED! He tried to apologize for his atrocious behavior, but only after I showed him the blog and then I still felt that he was lying (see #7). He used the word belated, which almost swayed me just enough, but in the end, he is very much Hated!

5. Wind: It gives us energy, it helps the ecosystem, it creates climate, it helps animals...ALL BULLSHIT! What is does do is mess up my hair, make it hard for me walk and even function for that matter. The Wind Sucks! It blows up skirts of hot chicks some would say, wow this sounds amazing, but why is it never the hot chicks that have their skirt blown up? It is always the chubbies or lesbos, I mean really the Wind SUCKS! Try playing Frisbee in the wind...you cannot! A mind blowing question for you (pun intended)...When walking in the wind would you rather be fat or skinny? You see, I'm skinny I get blown all over the place but then the fatties have more surface area for the wind to hit, it might be a toss up! Bottom line, the wind does nothing good for me and that is why I HATE it!

4. Greg (gregarious): Even easier then Koko, Greg gets on my nerves and he forgot the the third most important day in America...for this he is HATED!

Only 3 more to go...